A Quick Burst Of Rage

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Art by Meg Litter

Art by Meg Litter

I fucking hate ordering fast food.

I’m pretty sure I’ve never got an order correct. EVER!!!!!!!! I have lived here my entire life and that’s a long time for them to get my McChicken “plain” down. No mayo, no lettuce. Fuck you.

I just went to Burger King and got a 10 piece McNugget…..sorry, regular nugget and asked for sweet and sour sauce and they gave me two honey-mustards. GOD. FUCKING. DAMMIT!!!! You stupid motherfuckers. Do you know how much I hate honey-mustard? You must be doing this shit on fucking purpose because you execute it so perfectly. It’d be different if I got an extra milkshake or the coveted curly fry among the regs. But no. You leave out a taco or give me FUCKING HONEY-MUSTARD!!!!!

I know what you’re thinking. I like honey-mustard. Fuck you. I hate it. I hate ranch too. Regular honey, ketchup, barbeque, sweet and sour! That’s how I role. Fuck ranch. And why can’t I walk through the drive-thru?  You think you’re better than me cuz you have a car?! Every fucking time they leave something out. And I’m too fucking stoned or drunk and I sit on it and say, “Oh well, this is the norm.”.  And fuck, it is the norm. I want my fucking order to be correct for once.

This is horseshit.

 

SAASH (Semi Above Average Super Heroes)

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SAASH (Semi Above Average Super Heroes)

I love movies.

But everything is too epic now.  People love comic book movies that have characters with crazy super powers that conquer evil in the end with some abnormal ability.  I want more movies like Mystery Men.  There’s no middle ground.  Either you’re super powerful and have to use your strength combined with others to defeat the enemy or you’re some joe schmo that has to find his inner strength.

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