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Eating All Of The Halloween Candy At The Beginning Of October - 10/10 also 1/1

Everyone gets everything he wants. If the thing you want is a bag of Halloween candy then it’s easier to get your hands on that sort of thing that say a yacht or a fully functioning robot head.

Standard Halloween practice says that you shouldn’t eat all of your Halloween candy within the first week of October. Not only does Halloween candy cost upwards of ten bones per bag, but if eaten in one sitting (hypothetically while watching two episodes of Selling Sunset on Netflix) your stomach runs the risk of falling out of your body and suing you for gross negligence.

All of that being said, there’s an orgiastic pleasure in shoveling through a bag of chocolatey, caramelly gooey decadence. It’s Satanic in its hedonistic luxury. As the cavities form in your mouth and your blood sugar rises to nightmarish heights the candy coma will make you forget the problems of the real world. Eating an entire bag of candy in one sitting is the best and worst of both worlds.

Eating All Of The Halloween Candy At The Beginning Of October, consider yourself reviewed.

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