An Excerpt From Our Interview With Fancy Lad

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An Excerpt From Our Interview With Fancy Lad

To read the full interview pick up issue 5, a thing you can do by clicking this link! Wow! HTML!

KP: How did Fancy Lad get started?

BIG: The name Fancy Lad came from me working at a cafe with Legs who I guess you could say is on the team but not really because he doesn't really skate anymore. Same with Vey. I wish they had full parts but it's impossible to get it out of them. I was working at this bakery with Legs and our manager Phil was, I don't know how to describe him besides he was very...let's say, pretentious and kind of a snob...a little prissy in ways. We used to call Phil, Fancy Lad Phil. We got that term from Cabin Boy, the movie with Chris Elliot. So I was working there and we were using that as a derogatory term for really rich, pretentious hipster people. We thought it was funny because we were gonna make this low-fi, really shitty looking, whatever it is video. We were making that video and we finished it and I pretty much had no ambitions at the time. I was filming Fiske who skated for Heroin and he wanted to edit his own part. We just ended up making that video and it was just an afterthought. We showed it to Arty who used to own Coliseum and he suggested just printing one graphic and seeing what happens. We actually printed that VHS graphic which is still our best seller today. So, I guess we got lucky that he decided to print that one.

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An Excerpt From Who Is Montezuma And Why Does He Take Revenge On My Asshole?

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An Excerpt From Who Is Montezuma And Why Does He Take Revenge On My Asshole?

I’m standing in line, waiting, on my way home from the bar, subtly swaying back and forth with my feet planted like cinder blocks at the bottom of the lake. It could be a minor pee-pee dance or just something to keep me distracted from the spins – I’m not entirely sure at this point. I’m just trying to maintain my composure. It’s almost my turn to order. I’m watching the couple in front of me, their arms intertwined with each other’s bodies as they order their food by numbers. They complete the transaction and move aside. It’s my turn.

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Vampires Kiss - 1988

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Vampires Kiss - 1988

Immediately after I rail the second line of adderall the bartender, a lanky, hipster barber neck tattoo, leans in and yells, “Do it in the bathroom!” He has dreamy eyes but I yell back, “You’re sweet. Maybe later!” I give him a wink and spin around. It’s a bar in the financial district called The Straight Line. I’ve successfully found the most Wall Street white guy bar in Los Angeles in order to prep for my review of Vampires Kiss. I brought a baggie of crushed up adderall, some amyl nitrate, three condoms, paper clips and fake vampire teeth. I’m wearing some semblance of a suit that I could put together from Goodwill (The Kill Pretty budget leaves something to be desired.) I look like an extra in a bad Wolf of Wall Street sequel. I’m doing research, real journalism. Anything to rationalize my new found adderall habit.

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Squeeze The Trigger From Kill Pretty Issue 6

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Squeeze The Trigger From Kill Pretty Issue 6

Issue 6 of Kill Pretty may be our grimiest yet. Case in point: Squeeze The Trigger by gonzo photographer Richard Perkins and surrealist writer Jacob Shelton. With photos by Perkins and words by Shelton, this booze fueled look at the hidden world of slime beneath normal, every day America will shock and delight. Here’s a taste, but if you want to see the whole thing you’ve got to pick up the magazine.

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Daniel Stessen Invites You To Check Out Dream Corp LLC

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Daniel Stessen Invites You To Check Out Dream Corp LLC

Dreamcorp LLC is one of the weirdest shows to ever drop onto broadcast television, if you slept on this show you seriously missed out. We spoke with the folks behind the series about their dreams, making TV on a small budget, and chopping off limbs. You know, normal stuff.

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Help Us Shop For A Brick

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Help Us Shop For A Brick

On Fridays we tend to run a funny little article about criminals burning in hell or people pretending to puke but today it’s all business because we need help buying a specific brick. We can’t tell you what we’ll be using the brick for, but we can say that it needs to be dense, easy to lift, and heavy enough to crush someone’s head into a big pile of goo. Let’s shop!

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Steve Torres: Employee Of The Month

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Steve Torres: Employee Of The Month

In every issue of Kill Pretty we highlight an Employee of the Month so you can see how things work behind the scenes at our office, and so you can can get to know the people who write this smut. Read a little about our employee of the month, Steve Torres, and check out the rest of our weird information about him in issue six of Kill Pretty.

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An Interview With Aileene McConnley, Leading Chemtrail Expert

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An Interview With Aileene McConnley, Leading Chemtrail Expert

I’m standing in a field near Chico, California with Aileene McConnley. She hands me one of those white air filter masks that people wear while they’re mowing the lawn. “See those?” She points at a pair of white streaks that crisscross each other in the sky. “The trails are going to be heavy today.” When I ask what exactly it is that chemtrails do she scoffs at me and hands me an already opened umbrella.

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Frog Reviews By Sarah Lew, An Excerpt

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Frog Reviews By Sarah Lew, An Excerpt

Does issue six of Kill Pretty feature long form interviews with graffiti icons, horror game changers, and obscure comic book artists? Absolutely. But the question you’re not asking is, does issue six of Kill Pretty feature reviews of different frogs? Hell yes it does. We’ve included a couple of these necessary and important reviews below, but you’ve got to buy the magazine to see how the rest of the frog community holds up.

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An Excerpt From Our Interview With Brian Yuzna

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An Excerpt From Our Interview With Brian Yuzna

For a certain sect of horror fans Brian Yuzna requires no introduction, but his erotic, gooey horror films not only skirt the edge of good taste, they’ve kept him on the edge of the mainstream for his entire career. Issue Six of Kill Pretty features an in depth interview with Yuzna that touches on every aspect of his career, from producing Re-Animator, to directing Society and the non-everyman persona of Jeffrey Combs. Check out the excerpt below, but if you want to read the full thing you’ve got to pick up the magazine.

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Five Thieves Who Deserve To Burn In Hell

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Five Thieves Who Deserve To Burn In Hell

Here at Kill Pretty we love crime. It’s the best. Regulars and normals may have an aversion to theft, thieves, and crime-doers but not us. That being said, we also believe that some people deserve to burn in Hell for eternity for their sins against Heaven and possibly even Christ. We’ve rounded up five thieves who deserve to burn in Hell, but not for the crime of committing crime.

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