Kill Pretty Tells You How To Spend Your Weekend

Wasn’t it just the weekend? And now you’re expected to spend another two days hanging out and waiting to go back to work? If you don’t know how to spend your weekend why not do it up Kill Pretty style? We asked some of your favorite Kill Pretty writers how they’re spending the weekend, feel free to copy, mix ‘em all up, or do something else and let us know what kind of trouble you got up to.

Tyler Nacho

It’s the weekend? What are days? I’m still coming down from a two week ecstasy and ketamine high so I guess I’ll spend the next couple of days drinking water and watching home videos that I’ve been taking of my neighbors. If I have any leftover ketamine I’ll probably finish that off.

Jacob Shelton

Did you know there’s a dungeon in the Los Angeles Central Library? Not like a sex dungeon or anything, but a place where the librarians lock up readers with exorbanent late fees. The word on the street is if you bring your favorite librarian a snack they’ll take you down into the dungeon and let you whip one of the prisoners. So I guess I’ll trying to do that.

Employee of the Month, Brian Thompson

Huh? Man my weekend starts on Wednesday you know what I’m sayin’? Naw I’m just kiddin’ my weekend starts on Thursday night like everybody else. I’ll probably go down to Dirt Row and scam some tires or somethin’. I’ve been lookin’ for some new tires. You know where I can get some tires?

Steve

Why do you want to know how what I’m doing this weekend, or any other day for that matter? My days are for myself, no one else.

Shadrom the Grey

My days are spent toiling for one thing and one thing only, The Amulet. Regardless of weekday or weekend I travel the astral plane searching for the one item that can turn the skies black and quell the coming of Marstoff’s army of grackles. If I have the time I’ll pop into IKEA, I’ve been looking for some new end tables for my guest room.