26 - Do not aspire to be a pro Frolfer.
27 - Watch "Flight of The Navigator".
28 - Toothpaste is poisonous. So stop eating it!
29 - Watch out for the crazy lady that works at the Safeway and always stares at you. We don't what she wants.
30 - If you run into Kirk Hammett and accidentally call him Mark Hamill while you're hammered at a Primus concert, he will be cool and still give you an autograph on a Tic Tac box.
31 - If you are high and in a stadium concert full of 10's of thousands of people and hear someone shouting your name, ignore it. It's all in your head.
32 - If a girl is annoying the shit out of you at the club you work security at, don't throw her out. She's actually trying to hit on you.
33 - Ignore the number 3 at all costs. Especially if there are three 3's.
34 - If someone offers you free cocaine, you say yes.
35 - VCR's are not robot heads. Don't try to feed them Tootsie Roll Lolly Pops through the video slot.
36 - Flowers are not made of cake frosting, even if you are on Acid.
37 - If you are too high off Acid, drink a 30 rack. It will help.
38 - Don't get your wisdom teeth pulled if you are an already stupid person.
39 - Mortal Kombat theme song plus slow motion karate equal greatest talent show performance ever.
40 - No one in Nine Inch Nails has or ever will have nine inch nails...on their fingers.
41 - Don't use the same toothbrush as your roommate's girlfriend.
42 - SpongeBob SquarePants has a perfectly normal brother named LoofahBill RoundShorts.
43 - All the Fast and Fuious movies were based on true events.
44 - Milk actually does a body bad.
45 - Elephants can communicate to each other through the ground.
46 - Jason Voorhees did't get his hockey mask until the 3rd Friday the 13th.
47 - My anaconda don't want none unless you got buns hun.
48 - Always lock the door during Patty Cake.
49 - If you are going to rob a bank, don't wear a mask of your actual face. And don't use a steamroller as your getaway vehicle.
50 - There is no "I" in TEAM. Unless you speak spanish.