Resident expert Jacob Shelton knows just about everything about anything, and that’s why he’s the perfect person to review and consider the wide range of topics that are available in this strange, chaotic world.

Exercise - 4/10

I'll be the one to say it (I actually have to be the one to say this because I’m writing it), I’m surprised by how much I enjoy working out. I don’t enjoy it so much that I’m rating in above a four, but that’s pretty good for an activity that makes you disgusting and tired.

When I told everyone in the Kill Pretty Zoom call that I was thinking of reviewing exercise they shouted about endorphins and six packs and babes. And after one work out do I have an endorphin rush that makes the white water rapids look like a kiddie pool? Is my six pack more pronounced than the Washington Monument? Am I filthy with babes?. You bet your ass those things are what’s happening.

Even though I’ve become an unquestionable adonis after my single bout of exercise I’m still not sold on the concept. I have to set aside 30 minutes to an hour every day to squat, thrust, push myself up, and then allow myself to fall to the ground before pushing myself up again? No thank you. I enjoyed the experience but not enough to pick up the medicine ball and give it another go.

Exercise, consider yourself reviewed.

You can follow Jacob Shelton on Twitter and Instagram or read more of his work in Mindfuck or in like every issue of Kill Pretty.