Cool 90s Things That You Can Be Nostalgic About Instead Of Good Burger

Cool 90s Things That You Can Be Nostalgic About Instead Of Good Burger

It’s Fuck Good Burger Week here at Kill Pretty, and all of our writers and editors are dedicating their energy to reminding you how bad the movie and TV show Good Burger was. We thought about calling it “Bad Burger Week,” but that’s just as bad as the actual nostalgia surrounding Good Burger. Think about it, would you pay $30 for a Good Burger experience? Do you need your picture taken in front of a bad mock up of the All That logo? No way! You need to give that money to us.

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An Excerpt From Our Interview With Doug Stanhope

DS: I was just searching midget porn.

KP: For any specific reason or just to get off?

DS: I’m trying to buy DVDs of weird porn and I’m like, “How do you buy porn?” I can’t remember the last time I bought a hard copy DVD porn. We do porn and eggs parties, occasionally, for brunch. Last time we had a vintage porn that someone had sent us, like 1940’s shit, then there’s the potluck and… yeah.

KP: That shit’s crazy how they had to reel it on a reel and then set up a projector just to get 10 to 30 seconds of soundless porn.

DS: Yeah, but it wasn’t like that, it was more “burlesque,” girls stripping, it was just weird what we had, but it was funny. And then we waited as the day wore on and everyone got drunker and then we switched it out for hardcore tranny porn. So people noticed, “Oh, jeez,” but they stayed. So now it’s, “What do we want to do for the next one?” Do we do amputee porn, fatties, grannies - it can’t be regular porn. It’s gotta be weird on some level.

KP: You were probably jacking off in the ‘80s when you had to buy those boxes or rent them at video stores

DS: Yeah, in the ‘80s I had to rent them, but I had to go down to the liquor store when I lived in LA in the ‘90s and then they had them about cigarettes behind the counter. “What’s the title on that one? Yeah, I guess it can be that one. Just give me the longest compilation. I’ll fast forward.”

KP: Was it a lot harder to find really weird shit at that time or could you still find the weird amputee midget stuff?

DS: Well, when you were in a video store, they would have that back section and you could browse, but not like today. You couldn’t click on Youporn and type in a fuckin’ word.

KP: I’m really into psychedelics and as you can tell, the magazine is pretty psychedelic. I know you stopped taking them for a while and I’ve heard you talking about them again.

DS: I feel like I should the same way I feel like I Should get out and exercise more. I just hate doing it. Once I’m tripping, I’m glad I did. Just thinking about tripping, “Fuck, that’s like eight hours.” I hate puking and occasionally I’ll puke in the beginning. Drinking, at the end you go, “Oh, I’ll never drink again.” Psychedelics at the beginning you go, “Oh I don’t know if I want to go through with this.” At the end you’re like I’m so glad I did it.”

Need the rest of Doug’s story? You gotta buy the mag! Buy it HERE!

Thoughts on Re-Animator, Lovecraft, and Teenage Obsession

Thoughts on Re-Animator, Lovecraft, and Teenage Obsession

As a latchkey kid coming of age in an incredibly unstable household in the early 90s I gravitated toward the spooky, the strange, and the macabre. Lunch time discussion with my twisted chums rarely ascended above who had seen the goriest film or read the creepiest story over the weekend. Andrew Guthrie, all red hair and freckles, tended to lord over the conversation with spot on retellings of Hellraiser 2 and Stephen King’s “Tommy Knockers.” Soon, 6th grade turned to 7th and Andrew moved away, leaving me with a hole of horror to fill.

 

CLICK THROUGH FOR SPINE TINGLING TERROR!

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Let's Give The Moon Another Shot

Let's Give The Moon Another Shot

There are days, weeks even, when I think about returning to the moon; not that I’ve ever been. Going to the moon used to mean something, every few years our great nation would stretch it’s space legs and the world would squint into the sky and try to partake in the spectacle. Other countries tried to replicate our success but we were truly the master of the cosmos. Now that our eyes are set on colonizing Mars we’ve all but given up on sauntering across the chalky landscape of our once great conquest.

CLICK THROUGH FOR THE ARTICLE

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